SORCERER SUPREME - Incompetent Wizards Actual Play - #gamingforgood 2024

Episode 2 May 01, 2024 01:29:45
SORCERER SUPREME - Incompetent Wizards Actual Play - #gamingforgood 2024
Explorers of Elsewhere
SORCERER SUPREME - Incompetent Wizards Actual Play - #gamingforgood 2024

May 01 2024 | 01:29:45


Show Notes

Four Wizards, wielders of reality-bending magicks, decide to help a run-down hotel on a hill with some unwanted guests that go bump in the night. Unfortunately, these Wizards are 100% confident, 0% competent.


Played using the Sorcerer Supreme one page ruleset, by Andrew Harrison - (Game originally written by:



Tabletop Audio

The Witching Hour by Nicolas Jeudy/Dark Fantasy Studio

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Episode Transcript

[00:00:00] Speaker A: We're all going to go, hey, that's what happens when you click the button without realizing. You click the button. Hi, everyone. That's how we do here. Explorers of elsewhere, welcome to game two. We are playing sorcerer supreme in our charity livestream for 1625 Independent People's gaming for good 2024 event. Hello, hello, welcome, welcome, hello, hello. We had a lot of fun playing nice marines. This, I assume, promised to be slightly different in tone, but perhaps quite similar in outcome. Yes, we will see. So first thing first, welcome back, Errol and Meg. Hello, hello. Hi. Yes, hello. Thank you for. For coming back. And we are welcoming Julia to the stream as well. [00:01:03] Speaker B: Hello, hello. Hi. [00:01:05] Speaker A: So we've got, what, three fifths of campaign two sat here? [00:01:09] Speaker B: Oh, good point. [00:01:10] Speaker A: Yeah. Oh, yeah. Three fifths there is. And a blast from the not too distant past ripping campaign one. Hi, Tim. How you doing? [00:01:21] Speaker C: Hello. I'm lovely, thank you. I'm ready to go. I'm so ready. [00:01:31] Speaker B: Mmm. [00:01:32] Speaker A: So I'm aware that there were some audio issues in the last game, so if anyone's too loud or whatnot, please let me know and I will mute them. [00:01:44] Speaker B: Tell you what, Dan. Dan, tell you what, if you're able to angle your camera down ever so slightly, we will be able to see. Hooray. Thank you. [00:01:57] Speaker A: Just, just there. Perfect. [00:01:59] Speaker C: Our perfection. [00:02:00] Speaker A: So this is sorcerer supreme. It is a game from the hallowed halls, or hallowed vaults of Reddit is written by one Andrew Harrison. It was part of a 200 page. 200 word. 200 page. Blimey. 200 word rpg contest, and it revolves around wizards who are obviously spellcasters who can reform the very, very fabric of reality using their powerful arcana to do pretty much whatever they like. And we follow a group of wizards as they stride out to solve a problem that no one asked them to solve. In addition, our wizards are utterly, utterly incompetent. [00:02:50] Speaker D: So, spells, what do you mean, incompetent? We are very competent. [00:02:54] Speaker B: Thank you very much. [00:02:55] Speaker D: We are very highly trained and highly skilled wizards. [00:02:58] Speaker A: I said competent, not confident. That's so. As we all know, spells are constructed of a series of magical words. There are 20, which our players have to hand, and there's. Well, there's 20 and they're quite. They're quite long. But all spells are made up of magic words. So when the need arises and a wizard needs to cast a spell, they will create some sort of unholy combination of the words to create the spell they want to do, because each word of power has a specific purpose. So, for example, preventia prevents things like introduces an idea of prevention. Somateria introduces the concept of a physical form. So, you know, like me, you, that desk, etc, etc. And when a spell is cast, we roll d tens for each word in the spell and on a six to ten, so 50% chance the spell works. The word was correctly intoned. On a two to five, the word wasn't quite correctly intoned, and it works partially or incorrectly. And on a one, you've said the wrong word entirely. I replaced that word with a random one. And then we figure out what your spell looks like after the fact. Sorry. We have more donation incentives for this session. So five pounds reroll, a failed word. Ten pounds reroll, a successful word. 20 pounds. I will add a random word to the next spell. And 40 pounds. Wizard. Jewel is a jewel. [00:04:45] Speaker B: Oh, no. [00:04:47] Speaker A: Yes. And as we got more donations in the first session than I was expecting, which I'm incredibly, incredibly grateful and thankful for, I have put the at goal incentive. If we hit the 100% goal, I will. I have a french made outfit on standby, and that will be worn for the rest of the EOE livestream, as well as the heroes wanted livestream that we'll be taking part in from 06:00 p.m.. Tonight. [00:05:19] Speaker B: And just to clarify, roughly, how far are we off our goal? [00:05:23] Speaker A: So we are at 46% of our goal. [00:05:26] Speaker B: Okay. And we've had 115 in donations. [00:05:29] Speaker A: Okay. Yes. So it is potentially, hopefully, very, very, very durable. So, with that in mind, let's meet our sorcerers supreme. Let's start with Julia. [00:05:45] Speaker B: Nice. Nice use of the proper words there. You made sorcerers like attorneys general. I like it. Hello. Hello. My name's Ophelia. Ophelia Spellsworth Smythe, and I went to the best wizard university, of course, and I'm a very good wizard, naturally. Head of the class. Yes. [00:06:12] Speaker A: Okay. Just a real elevator pitch. What does Ophelia look like? [00:06:17] Speaker B: Ophelia is a lady. She wears kind of big pebble glasses and always has her long dark hair sort of scraped back. She's a bit sort of posh and nerdy and big front teeth. Hello. [00:06:37] Speaker A: Okay, wonderful. That's Ophelia Errol. Hello. Who are you? Who's your wizard? [00:06:46] Speaker B: Hi, I'm Draswee. I am the backwards interpretation of everything that is to do with wizard. So let's say I'm wearing incredibly long, pointy shoes, zero hat, very short robe, probably too short, with some hot pants going on. Wizardly hot pants. [00:07:09] Speaker A: And they got little stars and moons. [00:07:11] Speaker B: On them, like, yeah, yeah, okay. No, no beard, no mustache, cleanly shaven, maybe Mohawk going on. And very short wand, just like a bit like, just like, just this big. But it, but it works well. It works incredibly well. [00:07:34] Speaker A: Yes. [00:07:35] Speaker B: Yeah. Marvelous what you do with it. That's what's important, not how long the wander. [00:07:42] Speaker A: Well, speaking of long wands. Hi, Meg. [00:07:48] Speaker D: Hello. [00:07:50] Speaker A: Who are you playing? Oh, sorry. Oh, yeah, we have. Meg, who are you playing? [00:07:55] Speaker D: I am playing obnoxious pricked. Yes, and I am the most highly skilled wizard, more so than anyone else in the academy. [00:08:10] Speaker B: We'll see, we'll see. [00:08:12] Speaker D: We will, we will. I'm pretty sure that when putting our skills to the test, we, we know exactly who will come out on top. And obnoxious is just an amalgamation. Just imagine every wizard stereotype, okay? Like four or five wizards, and just cram them all together because they've got everything. They've got the pointy hat, but couldn't quite decide whether they wanted a pointy hat or a fez. So what they've actually got is like a big velvet pointy hat with a tassel on. They're wearing robes that just have every single emblem on them that you can imagine. They've got their stars, there's moons, there's like, there's pentagrams, there's like the silver filigree. They're just their entire neck and arms and everything is just covered in all sorts of occult jewelry. Yeah, you name it, it's there. [00:09:14] Speaker A: Marvelous. Okay. And last but not least, Tim, who are you playing? [00:09:21] Speaker C: I am Blandalf the beige, a name I earned once from an old friend who he's having terrible trouble returning a ring. You see, he'd failed to keep the receipt and, well, he had to go back there several times and my goodness, let me tell you. Anyway, as you can see, I'm wearing a very, well, it's a little bit flashy, if you don't mind me saying, but it's a lovely beige cardigan and a flat cap, which is much more I find convenient. And, oh, I got it back from my, from my old aunt now. Oh, she was lovely. Old Auntie Errol made the loveliest little cakes. Anyway, apparently I'm okay at magic, so. [00:10:15] Speaker A: Very good. [00:10:16] Speaker B: Very good. [00:10:17] Speaker A: Amazing. Okay, well, so we have our four wizards. You are all graduates of wizard. Uh, and as such, you have decided to strike out into the unknown. The world is full of pitiful magic less commoners and is your, your duty to solve all of their life's grievances using your superior and frankly, impression oppressive magical repertoires? The problem is you're not entirely sure where it is you need to go first. So as you've been kind of wandering around, you've decided to, like. Your searches haven't produced anything of note and as such you've had to retire for the night in a nearby hotel. The locale is rather peculiar. The skies are. The sky seems to be. It seems to have been a very, very dark day. Like very dark clouds rolling overhead. Occasional, some might say ominous, lightning crackling off in the distance, silhouetting this rather lovely piece of architecture. A hotel sat on a hill surrounded by a metal fence that looks a bit undercared for. There's a few kind of straggly vines, like reaching up and kind of as if it's as if they're climbing over. The gate is slightly off kilter there. Perhaps they have some sort of infestation problem because you notice there's quite a lot of bats. But yeah, this, this place on a hill on its own next to the graveyard seems like the perfect place to stay for the night while you kind of gather yourselves and recoup to press on tomorrow to find a place that needs helping. [00:12:27] Speaker B: Yes. You know, traps. I was having a little think as we were checking in. This place looks a bit ramshackle, doesn't it? [00:12:35] Speaker D: I think it looks absolutely disgusting. [00:12:38] Speaker B: No, well, I mean, let's not be too, too judgmental. I mean, they are commoners after all. But now that we're here, do you think we might help out a little bit? Fix the place up a little? I'm sure they'll be very grateful. [00:12:50] Speaker D: Do you mean by burning the place down? Because it's absolutely. [00:12:54] Speaker B: If it comes to it. But let's not jump straight to that obnoxious let. Maybe we should try and fix up the fence, get rid of the bats, something like that. [00:13:02] Speaker A: Well, you're having this conversation. In the foyer of this hotel, you can see as you are entering in like heading up to the. To the building along the very kind of winding path from the slightly off kilter iron gate. You notice that there was some kind of discoloration above the door. Presumably a sign once hung there, but no longer. You don't know where it is, so you're not entirely sure what the hotel is called, but I mean, it's definitely a hotel. And as you kind of enter into the main foyer, you. That you're stood on this very plush long red kind of carpet that stretches the length of the hall. There's big sweeping stairwells at the far end, that kind of wrap either side. Immediately above those spiraling staircases is a large portrait of a very. [00:14:06] Speaker D: Oh, no. [00:14:11] Speaker A: Yes, a very. [00:14:13] Speaker D: Must have fallen down a hole. So crap in here. [00:14:19] Speaker A: Drasui has closed their eyes. That's so, yes. The portrait above the stairwell depicts a very pale and gaunt man. Dark hair slicked back across his. Across his head. He's got a very kind of snoot, a very confident looking kind of raised eyebrow, a slight pout in a very kind of very fine looking jacket. And as you kind of. As you're looking at this picture, there's a crack of lightning which kind of, like, whites out the room and kind of silhouettes everything inside. And when the light returns to normal and the candles flicker back to life, you see, stood in front of the portrait is the very same man in the portrait. In the very same pose as he's in the portrait. [00:15:15] Speaker B: Excellent. [00:15:16] Speaker A: Good evening, he says, and he seemingly glides down the stairs towards you. How may I help you? [00:15:29] Speaker B: Oh, the bloody hell is this? [00:15:34] Speaker A: Hi, Errol. [00:15:35] Speaker B: Hey, Errol. [00:15:38] Speaker A: Welcome back. Yes, I think you might heard all that. Yes. This. This man floats down to you and. Yeah, how may I help you? You. [00:15:54] Speaker C: We were just wondering if you were in need of a little bit of wizardly assistance. Your home. I couldn't help noticing it was looking on Zoopla earlier and. My goodness, the property values could be better. [00:16:10] Speaker A: The man not like looks, looks at you inquisitive with this, with the raised eyebrow, and then, like, strokes his very long, thin, pointy chin. And yes, it is quite hard to keep. To keep up with the upkeep of this place. Excuse me, I forget my manners. My name is Count von. Not a vampire of it. [00:16:40] Speaker B: Yeah, seems above board. [00:16:43] Speaker A: Welcome to my humble abode. I assume you are here. [00:16:50] Speaker B: That name on us one more time, just so. I've got it. [00:16:53] Speaker A: Count Vod, not a vampire of it. [00:16:57] Speaker B: Okay. I thought that's what I heard. [00:16:59] Speaker A: Yeah, just for everyone. Count von Piravich. [00:17:10] Speaker B: Okay. Excellent. [00:17:14] Speaker A: Boom. Um. I assume you are weary from a day's travel and wish. Wish bed and board for the night. [00:17:29] Speaker B: Kiss, please. [00:17:31] Speaker A: Well. Oh, sorry, meg. You've muted yourself, I think. Where have I muted you? [00:17:39] Speaker D: Sorry, that was me when I was sneezing earlier. [00:17:44] Speaker B: It. [00:17:45] Speaker A: Well, your colorful friend here is correct. It is. I am in need of some home renovations. So perhaps we do some do a trade. Your services in exchange for safe harbour from the night. [00:18:08] Speaker D: Oh, darling, I think it's way beyond renovations. You might as well just pack up and leave at this point. [00:18:14] Speaker B: What? He. What? He what? Obnoxious. Means to say is we'd be delighted to help. And a safe. A safe bed for the night sounds lovely. I mean, I definitely trust an establishment that promises a safe bed that goes out of its way to specify the safety of the. [00:18:31] Speaker C: Although, speaking of safety, if you were to have an inspector come and look at this place, you shall not pass. [00:18:42] Speaker B: End the episode ah. [00:18:44] Speaker A: That's it. [00:18:45] Speaker B: We're done. We're out. [00:18:49] Speaker D: Roll credits. [00:18:50] Speaker A: Bloody marvo. [00:18:53] Speaker B: Tim. [00:18:54] Speaker C: Inspiration. [00:18:57] Speaker B: Tim. But it's fine. Tim should get inspiration for the rest of their life. [00:19:07] Speaker A: He, the so Count von Notta Vampirovich nods solemnly. It is a sorry state of affairs, but I would be loath to leave. This house has been part of, been in my family's possession for hundreds of years, he says with a very, uh, comforting smile. [00:19:37] Speaker B: Yes, yes, selling point as well. It's true. It's very true, Jazzio. And I, too, understand what it's like to bear the burden of a long and rich heritage. My family goes back many hundreds of years. Also my family estate, it takes a lot of upkeep. So, no, there's no shame in needing a bit of extra help at all. [00:19:57] Speaker A: Precisely. [00:19:58] Speaker D: There absolutely is a lot of shame. [00:20:03] Speaker C: I see both of you share some quite prominent teeth as well. Perhaps that's something new upper class types have. [00:20:10] Speaker B: It's a trait of the rich. We could afford them. You? [00:20:16] Speaker A: Well, I've had my suspicions for a while that this misplace is home to a monster of the night. And perhaps you could root out this monster before it finds you. If we could have this done before, say, dinner, perhaps? I'm fond of a little midnight snack myself. So, let's say if you. You have until the cat, the strike of midnight, to root out this horror that lurks in these halls. And if you manage to find it, I will allow you to stay for the eve. [00:21:08] Speaker B: Right. [00:21:09] Speaker A: Are we in agreement? [00:21:11] Speaker B: Well, first of all, where do you suggest we look for this horrific. The halls, they said. The halls. Yes, well done. Specifically. This is why we keep you around, Count von Notta Vampirevich. Where would you suggest? [00:21:30] Speaker A: Like the very pale man strokes his very long and pointed chin. Well, I've heard skittering and scampering in the gardens, in the upstairs stairs, corridors in the basement. I would advise staying away from the dining room. We've just had the cutlery cleaned and we're setting up for dinner. [00:22:05] Speaker B: Very well. [00:22:07] Speaker C: Jolly good. [00:22:08] Speaker B: I think. [00:22:09] Speaker C: Who shakes? [00:22:10] Speaker B: I think we're in agreement then. Lovely. We'll, we'll be. We'll have the monster's head by midnight. [00:22:17] Speaker D: Oh, how great. Does anyone have any hand sanitizer? I feel like we're going to need it. [00:22:24] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, I always can. Hold on. [00:22:26] Speaker B: Wait, wait, wait. Bland elf absolutely has hand sanitizer. Use a spell for it. Why use hand sanitizer? Spell. [00:22:34] Speaker D: Spell. [00:22:34] Speaker B: Your hands clean. Surely, definitely need some spells. [00:22:39] Speaker A: That sounds like a spell team, actually. [00:22:43] Speaker C: No. [00:22:44] Speaker A: Well, who actually, who's doing, I don't think. [00:22:46] Speaker B: Is anyone cleaning their hands right now, or are we waiting till we've got them dirty? [00:22:52] Speaker A: I think. [00:22:52] Speaker C: Okay, I'll get out. [00:22:53] Speaker D: I think if you've got anything that will prevent them getting dirty in the first place. I don't really, don't really want to touch anything in this God awful, forsaken house. It's so dusty. [00:23:06] Speaker A: Magical. [00:23:07] Speaker D: I think there are potatoes growing on the banister. [00:23:11] Speaker A: Well, sorry, just as you're, as you're discussing this, Count von not a vampirovich notice, notices that you're discussing spellcasting, and then he, he bows very, very low. And if you excuse me, I'm required elsewhere. And he sort of, like, grabs the corner of the long red cloak that he's got and like, he does a big swoosh and covers himself over and then just stands there for a few moments, and then they were supposed to be lightning, and then there's a lightning for a moment, and then he's gone. [00:23:57] Speaker D: What cheap parlor tricks. [00:24:01] Speaker B: So where do we want, where do we start? [00:24:03] Speaker C: First of all, let's, uh, with the spellboard. I think. I think being. Yes, being hygienic is an excellent idea. Obnoxious. I will cast upon myself and, and you as well, if you should wish a little spell. So my intention here, I will cast the. So if. [00:24:28] Speaker A: Yeah, okay. [00:24:30] Speaker C: I will cast materia. So if dirt. Okay, Bermier. So if dirt. Fire. It'll burn. It'll burn any dirt off you straight away. You will be, will be absolutely fine. [00:24:47] Speaker B: So burn. [00:24:56] Speaker D: They're very expensive. [00:24:58] Speaker A: Just to check. Are you doing. Sorry, gonna ask that. If you're doing, like, hands specifically, I'm gonna need an additional somataria. [00:25:12] Speaker C: Oh, sure. [00:25:13] Speaker A: Like, you specify the dirt and then you got to specify the hands. So it might be c. So materia somataria fermi. [00:25:19] Speaker C: Ah, okay. Yeah, sounds good to me. So. [00:25:23] Speaker B: Or you could, if you only wanted. If you only wanted three words you could do. Preventia somataria, somataria. [00:25:31] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, yeah. Good shout. [00:25:32] Speaker B: Yeah, I think that's a bit safer than going forward. [00:25:38] Speaker C: All right, so prevent dirt hands. It's gonna be preventia somataria. Summit area, I guess. Yeah, somataria. [00:25:52] Speaker A: And we'll see how this goes. Click on the d ten. Three times they were. Ah, okay, so a six, a seven, six four. [00:26:09] Speaker B: It's actually not so bad. No, worse. [00:26:11] Speaker A: Prevent is correct. Dirt is per. Correct. Oh, what was that? What was 20 pounds? [00:26:21] Speaker B: No, no. [00:26:26] Speaker A: But to be fair, come through after the spell. Okay, so the next spell now, Dan. [00:26:31] Speaker C: Don'T you walk it back. Give them their money's worth. [00:26:34] Speaker B: No, no pity. Walk back, Stan. [00:26:37] Speaker A: Okay, so we're tacking on to the end. Extract us. [00:26:41] Speaker C: Oh, what was that? Worse or better. [00:26:46] Speaker B: Dirt hands is gonna go wrong and then extract. [00:26:52] Speaker D: It's like preventing dirt from body by extraction. [00:26:58] Speaker A: Oh, no. Thank you, big bear for 2020 donation. Okay, right. So prevent. Yes dirt, yes hands, because you rolled a four, so it works partially or incorrectly, and then extract to prevent dirt. [00:27:16] Speaker B: What better way to prevent dirt on the hands than taking the hand away? [00:27:19] Speaker A: So you. [00:27:21] Speaker C: Oh, no. [00:27:25] Speaker A: You. [00:27:30] Speaker B: This has gotten really body horror really quick, really fast. [00:27:34] Speaker A: Okay, so you ha. You cast the problem is, right. You've got to use your hands to curse, but you're also, like, trying to cast on your hands. Right. So it looks like you're doing, like, one of those very complicated things, like the cat's cradle type things. Um, so you are gonna prevent dirt. Okay. Extract. So extract water from a tomato. Okay. You, like, you're just, like. The magic's just sort, like, instead of going to your hands, the magic from your spells is just going from, like, one fingertip to the other, and you're just. And, like, there's a moment where you go, blast it. As you do that, the spells fling out of your hands and hit your feet instead. So you're, like, you. As you feel your toes tingle. And then you watch as the dirty rug underfoot, like, all of the dirt starts rising out of the rug and then moving away from you in a circle. So you're pulling out all of the dirt and grime, and it's just sort of, like, floating is orbiting your feet but not actually touching it. Okay. Okay. [00:28:55] Speaker C: And you've got my little asteroid belt. [00:28:57] Speaker A: Yes, yes. But as you walk, the dirt starts to get kind of, like, deposited behind. So, like, you're leaving dirty footprints. But your feet aren't dirty. [00:29:11] Speaker B: It's a little mud trail behind you. [00:29:15] Speaker A: With specks of, like, food crumb and, like, detritus. Yeah. Orbiting your ankles. [00:29:22] Speaker B: Darling. [00:29:22] Speaker D: Blandis, I think this quite defeats the point of trying to make this place look better. [00:29:30] Speaker C: Show me what happens if I show emotion. Sorry. [00:29:37] Speaker A: Okay, so with that in mind, what's your first port of call? Where are you heading first? [00:29:46] Speaker B: So we've got the basement, the gardens or the upper level? [00:29:50] Speaker A: Like the upper corridors. [00:29:52] Speaker B: Okay. What do people think? I feel like our friend Blandalf will be in lots of trouble if we go outside where there's even more dirt. True. So do you think, are you thinking point? I'm thinking basement or upper hall? Drazil. [00:30:14] Speaker A: Draz. [00:30:15] Speaker B: I mean, Traz. We. You have to elongate the we. Um, but that would make you an easard if you put it the other way around. Yes, I am. I'm not from around here. We say it differently where I'm from. The basement. Sounds exciting. Basement then. Let's go. [00:30:47] Speaker C: Let's face the long dark of the basement. [00:30:52] Speaker B: Into the depths. [00:30:55] Speaker A: Um, you head down, uh, so you like, there's a point where you sit in this grand hall and you're looking around thinking, oh, and then you happen to notice that there is a floor plan of the, of the hotel just on the water. So it's very handy. And you using the directions from this floor plan, you make your way down into the basement as well. As you reach the basement door, it. You notice that there's a wooden plaque on the door that says do. And then there's like really heavy scratches in the wood. Enter. And yeah, there's just a very tarnished brass circular door handle. The door opens with a very welcoming. [00:31:59] Speaker B: Sorry, did we open it? Did it just open on its own? [00:32:02] Speaker A: On its own. [00:32:03] Speaker B: Oh, great, okay, very convenient. [00:32:07] Speaker A: And as you peer down, you notice that the staircase, like descending into darkness. You watch as the staircase seemingly starts to like, elongate into the shadows. It's like the door frame could around you and you hear, you hear a slight scampering. [00:32:37] Speaker B: I would like to create a light source. [00:32:41] Speaker A: Yes. [00:32:42] Speaker B: Okay, so obviously, well, last time I'm going to, I'm going to into ex nihil luminous. [00:32:55] Speaker A: Create light. Luminous light. Okay, that's it. [00:33:02] Speaker B: Just x nihil luminous. [00:33:05] Speaker A: Okay, sure, go ahead and roll me a two. Dicer eight and six. Okay, you beautiful light appears. Uh, top of the class. [00:33:20] Speaker B: I told you. Wait, hang on. Luminous is remove light from the area. So you create what you create remove light from it. That's an example, Errol. It's not real, it's just luminous is light. [00:33:32] Speaker A: So because Ophelia did not specify where the light was coming from. [00:33:37] Speaker B: That's true. [00:33:39] Speaker A: Ophelia begins glowing. [00:33:41] Speaker B: Yes, like a very helpful, like, you. [00:33:45] Speaker A: Know, that kind of unhealthy, like light glow that's almost bordering on, like, neon green. Like she looks. Ophelia begins to look like she's radioactive. [00:33:57] Speaker C: Mister Burns in that one episode of the same. [00:33:59] Speaker B: Definitely intended. [00:34:00] Speaker C: Bring some love. [00:34:02] Speaker B: We're going to have a rave down in this. [00:34:04] Speaker D: Oh, darling, Breen really is not your Ophelia. [00:34:08] Speaker B: Speak for yourself. I think it's lovely. [00:34:11] Speaker A: And as you illuminate, literally illuminate yourself, you see a shadow skitter away into the darkness. [00:34:20] Speaker B: Yeah. Kitty, kitty. [00:34:25] Speaker A: So, yeah, what are you doing as you move down into the basement? [00:34:30] Speaker B: Maybe. [00:34:31] Speaker A: Well, actually. So I should probably describe. As you move down into the basement, everything's slightly distorted because it's illuminated by this kind of sickly radioactive green glow coming from Ophelia. And it's like the shadows being thrown off things are like, really long and stretch away from you quite some distance. But you find yourself in like, it's a relatively large, open basement. There are a lot of kind of crates and barrels and boxes appear to be covered in very dusty drapes. You can see that there's like, what appears to be a big wine rack over on the far side. There's. And just sort of like, in amongst all of it, there is a large stone slab, like on a table with a load of kind of metal arcane apparatus hanging over it, including what appears to be a large kind of brass conductor attached to the ceiling. Like, over your head, over the stone slab. [00:35:38] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:35:39] Speaker D: Oh, this is all very pedestrian, isn't it? I mean, gosh, what did he do? Go to spooky r us and just pick the first few things? Yawn. [00:35:54] Speaker B: Very interesting. Very interesting contraption. Do you think it's for barbecuing meat or something like that? I don't know. [00:36:02] Speaker A: Well, what's drazery doing when. When they're down there? [00:36:07] Speaker B: I may have gotten absorbed in my spell book for a moment because I missed a latter half of the explanation of the basement and this grill all I definitely a grill all droolsy, really paid attention to was Ophelia saying, here, kitty, kitty, and was like, oh. Immediately thinking, you know, what about creating a bowl of food for a cat? Okay, but so I guess creating a bowl of food might be ex nihil. And then I was kind of trying to figure out, I guess somatal materia is the physical form of it. But then do you need to do anything to specify the food, like Vitalia or something? Life giving options. [00:36:57] Speaker C: Oh, I wouldn't recommend Vitalia. [00:36:59] Speaker B: Just create new life. [00:37:04] Speaker A: Yeah, let's go ex nihil. So create. [00:37:08] Speaker B: Somataria probably form. [00:37:11] Speaker A: So you specify what it is, but presumably you want it to be healthy food. So, yeah. Life. [00:37:18] Speaker B: Or just, you know, meow mix. Meow mix does also support life. Yeah. [00:37:24] Speaker A: Okay, I think. I think that's a three word extent. Create physical form. Life. [00:37:31] Speaker B: Mm hmm. Ex nir hill sama terrier. Vitalia. Okay, I go. I'll roll three dice. One, two, three. It's d ten s, right? [00:37:41] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:37:50] Speaker C: Oh, dear. Oh, dear. [00:37:56] Speaker B: I've created some kind of homunculus. Tell you what, this could. This could have gone. This could have gone worse. [00:38:02] Speaker D: Oh, no. [00:38:02] Speaker B: Actually, we don't know what you've created. Oh, no. You've. You've created extract again. Oh, my God. [00:38:09] Speaker A: Okay. Right, so what you've done is create food. Create food. Um, okay, you. So you kneel down and, like, you're listening out for the sound of, like, whatever. Yeah. And as you sort of, like, wiggle your fingers, and you insert your words, and you get to. So you're just like, x nil Salvatoria. And then you pause and you're like, what was the word for life? Oh, I know. Extract us. And in the darkness, Rob donated. How much did Rob donate? [00:39:08] Speaker B: Uh. [00:39:09] Speaker A: Oh, this will be on the next one. [00:39:13] Speaker B: Here we go. [00:39:14] Speaker A: Donations, Rob. Thank you, Rob, for the ten pound donation. Okay, it's next. Successful. Okay, we roll. A success. No, like, as you wiggle your fingers and you're, like. You're looking at the ground, waiting for this bowl of, like, kitty mix to appear, you hear this intense, wet, ripping sound. [00:39:35] Speaker C: And. [00:39:38] Speaker A: And in front of you, like, a lump of this green, bloody mass appears in front of you. [00:39:47] Speaker B: What? [00:39:49] Speaker A: And, like, you sit there looking and thinking, that doesn't look like kitty mix. [00:39:57] Speaker D: Darling, use a tissue next time. [00:40:00] Speaker B: As I think. Kitty hairballs. [00:40:03] Speaker A: As the four of you, like, poke and prodd it. What? Who is it that picks up to inspect what it is? [00:40:11] Speaker B: Not. [00:40:12] Speaker D: I I'm not touching that with a ten foot barge pole. [00:40:16] Speaker C: I'm not sure I can pick it up at the moment. [00:40:18] Speaker A: That's the point. So, Blandoff, as you stand there looking, this green mass just sort of, like, starts sliding across the floor. [00:40:31] Speaker B: Just leaving. [00:40:32] Speaker A: A red bloody smear in a rock. [00:40:36] Speaker B: It's like we're playing nice marines. No? [00:40:42] Speaker A: Yeah. Who wants to pick up? [00:40:45] Speaker B: I'll start chasing it around. [00:40:50] Speaker A: You managed to catch it. And as you kind of hold it up, um, it's really odd. Like, the. The mass stretches to about three foot long, and it's. It seemingly got these, like, there's, like, a central mass, and then there's like five, like, tubes of this green bloody mushroom. And then, like, you stop. Like, the four of you stand there, like, turning your heads, trying to figure out what is. And like jasmine, as you kind of rotate it slightly, it dawns on you that you are pinching the shoulders of the skin of a goblin. [00:41:29] Speaker B: Oh. [00:41:30] Speaker A: And that you put your two fingers through the eye holes to pull the head up and, like, you see the nose and, like, oh, the skin and muscle of a goblin. Basically the food of the goblin. [00:41:45] Speaker B: I'm just gonna gently fold it like a laundry, like a t shirt from the laundry and just kind of place it on a crate. There we go. Did we find the monster? Have we won? [00:42:03] Speaker A: Well, as, as that happens, you sort of like the. Well, yeah, you, you place, you place the goblin flesh, the goblin skin puppet. What's obnoxious doing? [00:42:23] Speaker D: Obnoxious is just ignoring all of this utter tomfoolery. And he's looking around the basement with an appraising eye, and then he turns and says, I know what this space needs. This space is too dark and dingy and old fashioned. This space needs a home cinema. [00:42:51] Speaker A: Yes. [00:42:53] Speaker B: Will that help us find the monster? [00:42:55] Speaker D: This is. [00:42:56] Speaker B: Don't, don't. [00:42:57] Speaker D: The monster. The monster is, is just co, you know, that's just. We really want to transform this space. I have vision for this reason. Home cinemas are very, they're very, they're very en vogue. They're very vogue at the moment, you know, and I think they're a very good, they, they show that you've got a lot of wealth and that, you know, that you, that you like to, you like to have people round to show your wealth to. So, yes, I think this space needs a home cinema. [00:43:32] Speaker A: Okay. [00:43:33] Speaker D: And obnoxious is going to try and create a cinema screen. [00:43:38] Speaker A: Okay. How? [00:43:40] Speaker D: A functioning cinema screenings. So I was thinking it would be create ex nihil. [00:43:49] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:43:49] Speaker D: And then maybe, like, there's not physical object, is there? What's close to physical object? [00:43:56] Speaker B: Yes. So materia physics is the closest you'll get to. Oh, yeah. [00:44:00] Speaker D: Somataria. So x. [00:44:01] Speaker B: But then it's a life. [00:44:05] Speaker D: I was either gonna use that or maybe emulous, because it is, you know, illusion, isn't it? It's going to be a screen of illusions. But then also it's got to be electrically powered. So also potential. So maybe we're going ex nihil. Somataria potentia. [00:44:27] Speaker A: Emulous nine item electrical imitation. [00:44:36] Speaker B: Yes. [00:44:37] Speaker A: Okay, cool. Four dice. [00:44:40] Speaker D: This is going to be absolutely. This is because you're going to transform the space you won't even recognize it when it's done. Okay, that's a 701. [00:45:00] Speaker B: There's no way this could go wrong. Okay, so hang on. Was that five words? [00:45:06] Speaker A: No, just the three, but seven. [00:45:09] Speaker B: Oh, sorry. [00:45:09] Speaker D: I put five, didn't I? Too excited. [00:45:12] Speaker A: Thanks to Rob's donation. Meg, please reroll that seven. [00:45:19] Speaker D: Oh, dear. [00:45:22] Speaker B: Oh, nice. Even better. [00:45:26] Speaker A: Okay. Okay, so creating. [00:45:29] Speaker B: That's the one we want. Something that you've created. Something. [00:45:33] Speaker A: My goodness. So you've created 20. Magic. [00:45:38] Speaker B: Magic. Okay, that's okay. [00:45:40] Speaker A: Okay. Electric, which has gone wrong. [00:45:45] Speaker B: Kind of electric. [00:45:47] Speaker A: And then another 14. [00:45:50] Speaker B: Life. [00:45:51] Speaker A: No. Okay, so you like of noxious as you kind of stand there and you're like, oh, like getting all that popcorn. [00:46:12] Speaker D: Machine over there, and, oh, the seeds will must be upholstered in velour. [00:46:19] Speaker A: As you reach into your, reach into your bag and produce your Gucci wand. And from TK Max. And as you swish it and you swash it and you slip on the goblin skin suit, and, like, your one blast, like, flies off slightly. It hits the large kind of brass conductor that's on the ceiling over the stone slab, and, like, that spins slightly. And you, you know, you can't see it because there's no windows down here, but you hear a crack, a peal of thunder. And the light illuminates blue slightly as you see this electrical charge fly down the conductor, which has been kind of realigned. And you watch as this bolt of lightning shoots out and strikes what appears to be a perfectly preserved skeleton of a goblin that is, like, that was near the stone slab. [00:47:34] Speaker B: And I wonder how that got there. [00:47:37] Speaker A: The goblin skeleton, like, is enveloped in blue light. Kind of twitches and, like, shakes and vibrates. And then with a start, just, what have you done? And this skeleton stands up and sort of like, to look to you and, like, two eyeballs just kind of roll around in its eye sockets like two big yellow eyes. And then he looks down and then looks at you. Looks down, looks at the flesh too. And you took my skin. [00:48:13] Speaker C: I'll fix it. [00:48:17] Speaker B: Yeah, you will. Oh, wow. [00:48:21] Speaker C: So I want to. I want to infuse him with his skin. [00:48:26] Speaker A: I'm gonna say, you know, darling, deconstructed. [00:48:30] Speaker D: Cuisine is awfully on trend right now. [00:48:36] Speaker A: I'm gonna say injective somataria. Somatary. Because you have to specify the skin. You have to specify the goblin skeleton that's just been reactive. [00:48:43] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, sure. [00:48:44] Speaker B: Gonna regraft his skin on doing surgery. What? How did this happen? Easy. [00:48:55] Speaker C: Magic. Let's go. I did something with the skin of the goblin. Something's happening. [00:49:13] Speaker A: Oh, no, you, oh, God. [00:49:16] Speaker C: What? [00:49:17] Speaker A: Like, you point down. So in what? So, what was it? Inject. Injective. Infuser. Inject. Okay. So you grab the goblin skin and sort, like, you look at the goblin and you just, like, throw the, the skin on and the goblin skeletons just like. And as you saw, like, zapping with your, with your, uh, magnolia wand, um, there's a puff. And then nothing really seems to happen. And, like, the goblin slowly starts to, like, try to put the skin back onto himself. Like a big onesie. Um. And then, like the goblin, you hear us, like, the goblin stomach grumbling from inside the skin, I guess. And you watch as the goblin stomach starts to expand. And then the rest of the goblin begins to follow suit. And the goblin kind of looks you. It begins to fill the room. [00:50:25] Speaker C: No time to go. [00:50:28] Speaker B: Like, expanding foam, cleave into it. [00:50:33] Speaker A: And in the lieu of this goblin, which is like a, yeah, like a gas is just filling the space that it's in you're forced to leave the basement before you're consumed by this de gloved goblin skeleton block. [00:50:53] Speaker B: Oh, come on. That's horrendous. [00:50:57] Speaker C: This is why I can't be doing with home cinemas. The only television I need is a window. Have you seen nature? Oh, it's lovely. Honestly. It's. These days. [00:51:11] Speaker A: You get up to the top of the stairs and you kind of slam the basement door behind you. And you just hear, like, the squeaks and squeals that are getting slow, progressively lower in tone from the goblin as he gets bigger and bigger downstairs. Right. Yeah. I mean, that's dealt with. What's next? [00:51:40] Speaker D: Well, darling, you know what they say. Out of sign, south after out of sight, out of mind. [00:51:48] Speaker A: Seems really happy. [00:51:50] Speaker B: Okay, great. [00:51:51] Speaker C: I mean, him and his skin are one thing now at least. So very true. [00:52:00] Speaker A: Like, there are positive sounds of jubilation coming from the other side. He sounds like he's having the time of his life. [00:52:14] Speaker D: I think we've taught him an important, an important lesson around renovations and keeping the home in peak trendy. What trendiness. [00:52:29] Speaker B: I say we go upstairs and never speak of this again. [00:52:34] Speaker C: Okay. [00:52:35] Speaker B: Agree. [00:52:36] Speaker C: Capital idea. [00:52:38] Speaker A: Right. So in which case, you head back to the main hall. You head under the spiraling, the curving stairways. Presumably two of you go left to view. Right? That's only, that's only fair. And you notice, as you do the eyes on the painting of counts von Notta van Pirovich. Like, one eye follows two of you and the other eye follows the other two of you to the point where as you get to the top of the stairs and you're on looking completely bug eyed. Um, yes, you managed to make your way into the, the upstairs corridors. And this is like, you kind of step into, um, you step into a corridor with a very, again, a rich red carpet. The walls are kind of faded. Let's say they're sort of like a dark that they're a black wallpaper, like quilted wallpaper type thing with black door frames. And then in each of the door frames is a blood red door. And, like, the corridor is illuminated periodically by chandeliers, like small, small kind of little chandeliers. But yet you can appear into the corridor and it just kind of stretches on and on and on. And then turn this attack t junction at the end, you just got these identical doors all the way down and they start 1234-5678 yeah. You, as you sort of like, step into the corridor out of the upstairs main hall. [00:54:24] Speaker B: Lovely shade of red on these doors. [00:54:27] Speaker A: Yeah, it looks fresh. [00:54:30] Speaker D: I suppose it is a bit last century, you know. Now we. [00:54:35] Speaker B: Sometimes the classics are the best, aren't they? [00:54:37] Speaker D: Yes. Scarlet is just so overused now. [00:54:41] Speaker B: We're. [00:54:41] Speaker D: We're much more, you know, using vermilion these days. That's a much better, much better. Say it brings out the, you know, it really brings out the bloodstains, you know. [00:54:54] Speaker A: Well, as you're kind of having this conversation and walking along this corridor, you get to the end. Group decision. Left or right? [00:55:04] Speaker B: Left. [00:55:05] Speaker A: Left. Okay, you turn, you turn left and. Yeah, Philia. Obnoxious. As you're having this conversation, you stop as you turn left because in front of you is a corridor that looks almost identical to the one that you've just traveled down. And the doors are numbered 123456. But at the end of the corridor you see two young children in, like, black and white, like ones in like a victorian era, like boys school uniform. So, like, white shirt, little cravat tie, little black shorts. Stood next to her. Presumably his sister is a little pale girl in like a Wednesday adams s kind of black, you know, dress with a white blouse underneath it. And they're just like standing at the end of the hallway holding hands, staring at you both with, like, identical straight fringe bowl cuts. [00:56:13] Speaker D: No, no. Go, Julia, you were going, I think, you know. [00:56:18] Speaker B: You go ahead. [00:56:20] Speaker D: Obnoxious. Oh, don't worry. I am wonderful with children. They love me. Hello, young people. Are you feeling Peng today? Peng is slang that the young people use. You see, I know all of the young people slang. Penguin, bruv. [00:56:50] Speaker A: Riz, as you. [00:56:52] Speaker D: Are you having a nice riz, young people? [00:56:56] Speaker A: Well, as you approach these two children, you notice that she is holding, like, a teddy bear that's missing an eye. The teddy bear looks quite. Quite raggedy and like, there's. There's a gash down the side with some fluff and stuffing falling out. And as you ask, you know, are you. Are you having. Are we having a rising day? In unison, the children look to you, and Teddy is poorly. Teddy must be fixed. Will you fix Teddy for us? [00:57:36] Speaker D: Oh, dear. Well, you see, children, teddy bears are a little bit out of style these days. What I think you need is a tiger. Tigers are so much more on fleek as you young. Do you not agree, Ophelia? [00:58:03] Speaker B: Has anybody actually said on flee in about ten years? [00:58:10] Speaker A: Yeah, all the time. [00:58:11] Speaker C: Might as well dab at this point. [00:58:14] Speaker A: What? [00:58:16] Speaker B: Stop flossing. [00:58:19] Speaker A: Okay. The children, like the two children, in unison, tilt their heads at your words. And then we would like a tiger. [00:58:35] Speaker B: Obnoxious. Are you taking this one? Or Blandford? Bland. Elf. [00:58:39] Speaker C: Well, wouldn't they prefer a hoop, perhaps, or a stick and ball? [00:58:44] Speaker B: No. [00:58:45] Speaker D: See, those are so boring. And I know that children these days, they want excitement in their lives. And what's more exciting than a tiger? Don't worry. We'll make sure it's a friendly tiger. [00:58:57] Speaker B: What about a stuffy? A stuffy tiger? Just, you know, a plush or something. [00:59:01] Speaker D: But I mean, okay, we could try it, I guess. A stuffed tiger would be fine, but. [00:59:10] Speaker B: Maybe whatever the children want to have. And maybe they tell us about what maybe they know about this monster. Monster creepy thing. [00:59:22] Speaker D: Okay, okay, yeah, good idea. [00:59:25] Speaker A: The. Well, the little girl, like, hefts up the frayed teddy bear first. And fix Teddy first. Secret translator. [00:59:41] Speaker B: So, you doing it? [00:59:43] Speaker D: Go on then. Let's try it. So let's. Let's say we're going to. Oh, where was it? I just saw it. We're converting transmutia. Transmutia somataria. So transmuting the physical form of the teddy in size and. Right? [01:00:04] Speaker B: Yeah, the morphosia. Maybe change the shape. [01:00:07] Speaker D: Size and shape to a bigger physical form. [01:00:10] Speaker A: Yeah, right. The tiger is bigger than teddy. [01:00:12] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [01:00:13] Speaker D: So maybe transmutia somataria. [01:00:18] Speaker B: Magn. [01:00:19] Speaker D: Magnitudin. Morphosia somataria. [01:00:23] Speaker B: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Oh, God. [01:00:26] Speaker D: So that's. So that's. Convert teddy. [01:00:30] Speaker B: Same size of tiger. So you reduce it by. [01:00:33] Speaker D: Into size and shape of other physical form, which is the tiger. [01:00:37] Speaker B: So that's okay? [01:00:39] Speaker D: Yeah, that's fine. [01:00:40] Speaker A: Five words. [01:00:40] Speaker D: So that's what? 12345. That's five. We can do five. Five is good. [01:00:46] Speaker A: Yeah. Convert teddy size, shape, tiger. Perfect. [01:00:49] Speaker D: Yeah. 12345. [01:00:53] Speaker B: No, no. [01:00:57] Speaker D: Wonderful. [01:00:57] Speaker B: Don't worry, Julia. [01:00:58] Speaker A: Okay. [01:00:59] Speaker D: It's gone really well. Transmute. Transmute size. The shape is fine. We've got the shape of the tiger. [01:01:06] Speaker A: The shape. Not so much the tiger. Yes. So. So the shape. The tiger hasn't quite gone. Sorry. The shape of it hasn't quite gone to plan. But your convert is, in fact, infused. Okay. [01:01:27] Speaker B: Oh, oh, wait a minute. So what does it come out as? Infuse the teddy bear with the shape. [01:01:35] Speaker A: And sort of the size and sort of the shape. So what happens is this little girl holds up tiger teddy, and you're just, like, with a flick of the hair, you do your. You tone your spell, you zap the teddy bear, and the little girl, like, just drops the teddy on the ground. And then, in unison, the two of them, still holding hands, take one big step back, and you watch as teddy starts, like, growing to the size of a fully mature tiger. So fraud, since purposes pretty much fills the corridor, but it's not transforming into a tiger. It's still a teddy. And as it sort of, like, it's still kind of plushy. So just gonna look. Presses against the sides of the wall slightly. And from. Oh, from behind it, you hear, did it work from the two children? And then this teddy just lifts his head and looks to you and lets out a snarl. [01:02:54] Speaker B: Where did the life force come from? [01:02:57] Speaker A: We've infused. Oh, no, we've infused the spirit of tiger. [01:03:03] Speaker D: The spirit of tiger into a giant teddy, essentially. [01:03:08] Speaker B: At least he's only got one eye. [01:03:09] Speaker D: Wonderful. [01:03:10] Speaker A: This one eye teddy, with a bit of fluff hanging out, looks to you and lets out a guttural roar, like a tiger, and sort of like. Like, gets low, sticks his bum in the air and starts wiggling, and it looks like it's about to pounce. Drazue, what are you doing? [01:03:30] Speaker B: Oh, God. [01:03:32] Speaker D: Not any of that. Kitty draswi. [01:03:35] Speaker B: Yes. Literally just does the one spell combination. I kind of feel like in this situation. How big is it? It's, like, huge now, right? [01:03:53] Speaker A: It's bigger than big time. [01:03:55] Speaker B: Yeah. I either make small. So inject small tiger. Yeah, small. Be good. Inject small tiger. Or, like. Or reducto. Reducto. Magnitude. Yeah. Reduce size. What's the. Well, the magne magnitude is large. Small size of giraffe. But reduced size makes sense. [01:04:26] Speaker A: Okay, so you want to reduce. [01:04:28] Speaker B: Yeah, it would be somataria reducto. Right. Tiger reduced. Or reducto somataria. [01:04:42] Speaker A: So reduced Teddy. [01:04:44] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. Reduced teddy with soul of a tiger. [01:04:48] Speaker A: Okay, roll for it. [01:04:52] Speaker B: It's two. Is it two or three? [01:04:54] Speaker A: Unless you wanna be more. [01:04:56] Speaker B: Do you wanna get any more specific? Because I made that mistake and now I'm radio. You might reduce a different aspect of the tiger teddy, rather than the size of it, but the more that you. [01:05:13] Speaker A: Do, I would argue. I probably need aracano, because this is now an inherently magical creature, so you need to interact and expose. So I would argue aracano, reducto somataria. [01:05:30] Speaker B: Yes. Yeah, yeah. Well, I was also gonna go with, like, trying to, like, stop it from being angie too, because then if the size doesn't work, then maybe the. No, Angie will work. [01:05:43] Speaker A: Yeah. So maybe transmutia. You converting it from anger to happiness? [01:05:50] Speaker B: Yeah, I think so. So what, we went from two to five? Two to four. Cool. [01:05:56] Speaker A: Okay, awesome. Arakana. So magic reduction teddy convert, protection teddy convert. [01:06:05] Speaker B: Yeah, sounds perfect. Shrink and calm down the teddy. Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if one doesn't work, maybe the other will. Yeah, sure, sure. Oh, hello. Have a big, irate teddy. [01:06:20] Speaker A: Okay. Right? [01:06:22] Speaker B: Not bad, not bad. [01:06:23] Speaker A: Okay, so could have been worse. Interact with the spell. You reduce the size. Not quite the teddy, and you made them happy. Okay, you. Oh, you point your. Your stubby little. [01:06:38] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:06:39] Speaker A: And there's a loud cr. The beam of magic flies towards the teddy. The teddy tiger. And the tiger, like, hisses and does, you know, cats going their haunches, and the bolt goes under its belly, ricochets off the floor, and zaps the two children. So I'm swapping the teddy for the children, and you watch these two young. These two twins shrink to the size of garden gnomes and then look to you. [01:07:10] Speaker B: Cute. Yay. That's exactly what I meant to do. [01:07:17] Speaker A: But at the yay, they sort of, like, run forward, all happy and no longer. And they, like, all of the black on them, turns pink, and they, like, hug the back legs of the teddy tiger, who suddenly, like, lowers its head, looks between its legs, and then it looks back up and licks its lips. [01:07:38] Speaker B: Oh, no. Oh, no. [01:07:40] Speaker A: Bandolph Blandoff, what do you do? [01:07:43] Speaker C: All right, all right. It's an emergency situation, right? Has it, like, picked them up there on its leg? Right? [01:07:57] Speaker A: They're, like, hugging its. Its ankle, it's back. [01:08:00] Speaker C: Okay, we need to do this safely. So. [01:08:07] Speaker B: At the bass spray. [01:08:14] Speaker C: I think all we need to do then is just remove the problem, because the kids are happy now? [01:08:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:08:24] Speaker C: They don't need their bear anymore, so I'm gonna convert. [01:08:29] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:08:30] Speaker C: The location. [01:08:31] Speaker B: Okay. Of the bear. [01:08:33] Speaker C: Of the bear. [01:08:35] Speaker D: Tiger bear. [01:08:36] Speaker C: Tiger bear, Tiger burger. [01:08:41] Speaker B: The burger. [01:08:43] Speaker C: I'm gonna convert the location of the burger. Will I need another word to specify where it goes? [01:08:51] Speaker B: Just elsewhere, I suppose. [01:08:53] Speaker C: I don't really mind where it goes. [01:08:54] Speaker D: As long as. [01:08:58] Speaker A: We change the location of the bear. You don't have to specify, but be. That might help if you did actually. [01:09:11] Speaker B: Poofs into existence behind us. [01:09:14] Speaker D: That's a problem for later out in a volcano. And then you could use thermia. [01:09:20] Speaker B: Yeah, go send it somewhere hot. [01:09:22] Speaker C: All right. Yeah, I'll use. I'll use thermia then. So I'm going to send it into the nearest fire. [01:09:28] Speaker A: Okay, cool. [01:09:29] Speaker C: Oh, I think that's going to be good. [01:09:30] Speaker D: Location Teddy or hot locate, like, hot country where tigers like to live, you know? [01:09:39] Speaker C: Now I want to burn this bitch. [01:09:43] Speaker A: Right. [01:09:44] Speaker C: Four by seven. Oh, what is the Teddy? Magic or at the moment. [01:09:54] Speaker A: Yeah. Chuck in Aricano for magic before. Yeah. So it's a five. [01:09:59] Speaker C: Okay. [01:10:01] Speaker B: So I take my money, happen to be create with. Created with magic. [01:10:08] Speaker C: It's just transmutia, locatia, araucano, somataria, thaumia. [01:10:20] Speaker B: Oh, okay. [01:10:26] Speaker A: You have teleported the magical effect, but instead of the bear, you've done the reduce. [01:10:38] Speaker B: Twins are going into a volcano. [01:10:41] Speaker D: They're not, because that was a one thermometer. No, they're not going into a volcano. [01:10:48] Speaker A: The summit area and the temperature. So the bear are both ones. So, okay, so you're. You're converting the location, so you're teleporting the magical. Magical effect, but instead of the bear, we are picking the small, so the children. And the location is the small, so, like, these children are just like, yay. Hugging the back of the tiger teddy. And as you roar. Fire your spell off the. The tiger teddy gets, like, leaps out of the way, and the kids sort of, like, fall on their bums and, like. Like, cheering, and your spell zaps them and they. They shrink into the quantum realm and they vanish through existence as you teleport them to the tiny place, and they just vanish from existence. [01:11:54] Speaker B: Well, shit. [01:11:56] Speaker A: And the tie. The tiger teddy went rather well. The tiger teddy looks to you and snarls menacingly. Ophelia. [01:12:09] Speaker B: Get behind me, chaps. I'm going to try something risky. And I point my wand at this. [01:12:14] Speaker D: Like, all the other things. [01:12:16] Speaker B: Right? Well, I literally want to just stop it from. From living, so preventia Vitalia, I guess. Aracano, somataria, prevent life. [01:12:29] Speaker A: Magic bear. Okay. [01:12:31] Speaker B: Is that all right? [01:12:32] Speaker A: Yeah, go for it. Four dice. [01:12:34] Speaker B: Let's go. Hey, almost. [01:12:38] Speaker C: Oh, no. What have you prevented? [01:12:41] Speaker B: I prevented sort of life in the magic bear, I think. [01:12:46] Speaker A: Okay. Sort of. [01:12:50] Speaker D: Oh, I see a kitty cat. Is there a kitty cat in the window? [01:12:53] Speaker B: Sill of tofu? [01:12:58] Speaker A: Okay, so you prevent the. So it works partially or incorrectly? [01:13:05] Speaker B: Yes, I prevent sort of the life. [01:13:09] Speaker A: Okay. What happens is you. [01:13:15] Speaker B: Yes. [01:13:19] Speaker A: Yeah, the. So the tiger teddy, like, leaps, like, snarled kisses. Like, it's going to got a stub tail. So just, like, you just see this nubbin raise up in lieu of a. Like, an actual arched cattail, and, like, it leaps at you as you cast a spell. You're. You were attempting to return, like, take away its livingness. [01:13:41] Speaker B: Mmm. [01:13:43] Speaker A: As your spell zaps this teddy on the snoot, the teddy goes translucent and, like, blows straight through you, lands, like, floats down the corridor a little bit, looks a bit confused, and then sort of, like, checks itself out and you recognize that you've just turned this thing into a ghost. [01:14:03] Speaker B: Oh, okay. It's gone ethereal. That's cool. I mean, sure. [01:14:08] Speaker A: And the tiger Teddy looks to you and just, like, floats off through the walls, and you just hear, like, screams and cries of panic from sort of, like, elsewhere in the corridors as this ghostly tiger teddy starts terrorizing, the other people in this hotel, well, seem to. [01:14:27] Speaker B: Be creating more monsters. Job done. [01:14:31] Speaker A: Job done. [01:14:32] Speaker B: The children are no longer threatened by the tiger bear, and neither are we. [01:14:37] Speaker D: Once again, out of sight, out of mind. [01:14:43] Speaker A: So you. You. As that happens, you turn around and you notice that the corridor that you came down, you know, that lead from the great hall, as you peer down it, there's just another corridor that stretches out in front of you with doors numbered 1234 and so on as it stretches. And as you look like, because you're a t junction, right? So the corridor you were looking down that the tiger Teddy was in, doors 1234, the corridor you just came down, doors 1234, the corridor that turned off to the right that the tiger teddy is flown down, doors 1234, and you're like, oh, we've gotten turned around and lost. What do we do? [01:15:27] Speaker B: Go to the garden? [01:15:29] Speaker A: Well, obnoxious. What do you. What do you do? [01:15:35] Speaker D: You see all this wood paneling. Now, really, I'm really not getting the right vibe. And, I mean, long corridor. [01:15:47] Speaker A: It'S. [01:15:48] Speaker D: It's very Scooby Doo, don't you think? And it's very difficult to find where we're supposed to go. And if we're supposed to be locating this monster. Why don't we just do it with magic? [01:16:01] Speaker B: Obnoxious. Aren't doors quite blase? Maybe we should just remove the doors. [01:16:07] Speaker D: Oh, my gosh, that's such a good idea. [01:16:11] Speaker B: I quite liked the idea of locating the monster with magic. [01:16:14] Speaker D: Yes, but we can locate the monster so much easily if there are no doors. And also, it will give a real nice, open, spacious airplane, open air planning to the feel of this space, you know, really let the light in more and make it much more amenable to when you have guests over. [01:16:38] Speaker A: Okay. [01:16:39] Speaker D: Open plan is very chic right now. [01:16:42] Speaker A: What does this spell look like? [01:16:46] Speaker D: Rousear. Would you like to. Would you like to try this spell, or would you like me to take the reins? [01:16:52] Speaker B: I am happy to remove doors because we all know magic can't go through doors, so they have to be removed with magic before the magic can go through the doors. [01:17:04] Speaker A: So how. How are you removing. Are you teleporting them? Um, are you extracting the doors? [01:17:13] Speaker B: Extracting extractor seems good. [01:17:16] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:17:17] Speaker B: Extract door from door. Like, can I extract. Doors are primarily made of wood. Remove wood from door if they are indeed wood. [01:17:27] Speaker A: Extract door from frame. Okay. Yeah, cool. That's a three. Three. So, yeah. Extractor. Somataria. Somataria. [01:17:41] Speaker B: Yeah. Okay. [01:17:44] Speaker D: You'Ve got this. [01:17:47] Speaker B: Three. Okay. [01:17:52] Speaker A: So you extract the door from the frame. So you're extracting something from the frame. [01:18:01] Speaker B: I mean, technically, the first word is a failure as well. [01:18:06] Speaker A: Oh, it is. Okay. [01:18:08] Speaker B: Sorry to be a narc, but. [01:18:11] Speaker A: Right, so you're just like, get rid of the doors, and as you cast your spell, all of the doors become replaced by walls. [01:18:24] Speaker B: Oh, what was you saying about open plan? Obnoxious. [01:18:31] Speaker A: All of the doors are gone. All of the doors filled in, but now there's just walls with door frames. [01:18:39] Speaker B: Every so often, I've sims ed the patrons of this hotel. I've taken away the bladder through the corridors. [01:18:50] Speaker A: You hear, like, more panic, screams. [01:18:51] Speaker B: We're trapped. [01:18:57] Speaker A: Okay. What? Obnoxious. This hasn't quite gone to plan. You're still no closer to finding the monster. What's your solution there? [01:19:09] Speaker D: Well, I just think we should bring the monster to us. [01:19:13] Speaker B: Brilliant. [01:19:14] Speaker D: Have a nice chat with it, you know, conversation. [01:19:18] Speaker B: Go on, then. [01:19:19] Speaker A: Okay. [01:19:20] Speaker B: Okay. [01:19:21] Speaker D: All right. [01:19:21] Speaker B: Okay, good. I'd love to see it. Let's go. [01:19:29] Speaker D: Right. All right, then. All right, I'm going. I'm going to. Oh, let's have a look, I guess. Convert the location. [01:19:41] Speaker A: So, as I said, there is so. Injective infuser. [01:19:44] Speaker D: Inject injector oh, yeah, there is injectors. Yeah. Let's do inject. Let's inject zometaria. [01:19:53] Speaker A: Inject monster. Yeah. [01:19:55] Speaker D: Location. But. But I also don't want it to be just running free, so I want to trap it immediately. [01:20:04] Speaker B: Oh, good. [01:20:05] Speaker D: So how about inject somataria location? So, yeah, bring the monster here and then prevent. [01:20:20] Speaker A: Aura location. [01:20:22] Speaker B: Well, I was thinking preventia vectora. Prevent it from. [01:20:25] Speaker C: Maybe we could maybe. [01:20:28] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:20:29] Speaker B: Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah. [01:20:31] Speaker D: Preventia vectora. Yeah, let's do that. [01:20:34] Speaker B: A gentle observation. We don't actually know kind of what monster this is, so it could just be any monster that we're talking. I'm gunning for Van Helsing. [01:20:45] Speaker D: But, Gauzia, I've been a wizard for a very long time. I know what a monster is and what a monster looks like. Okay, I've got this. [01:20:58] Speaker B: Sorry, I've not. [01:21:00] Speaker A: Right, so inject monster, location, prevent move. That's a five dice spell. Hit me with it. [01:21:08] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:21:09] Speaker D: Is it. Is it a real spell if it's not five dice, at least showboating. That's a two. There's a couple of successes in there. [01:21:20] Speaker B: There's some great stuff in there. [01:21:21] Speaker C: Pretty successful spell, right? [01:21:23] Speaker B: So what, no critical failures? [01:21:26] Speaker A: There's no critical failures, no. [01:21:28] Speaker B: Might be gonna sort of do what you wanted it to do. [01:21:31] Speaker A: Just the benefits of everyone who can't. [01:21:35] Speaker D: So is inject physical form to this location prevent movement. [01:21:40] Speaker A: So 210 five nine. So. [01:21:43] Speaker D: Oh. To 1010. [01:21:45] Speaker A: Five nine to 1010. So 210, ten five. So that is a. Okay, so that one didn't work. So the inject bit didn't work. The monster did. The location did. The preventer didn't work, and the movement did. The movement did. [01:22:15] Speaker B: Okay, there's some real mental gymnastics required to run this game, eh? So the injection failed. Monster succeed. Monster succeed. Location succeed. [01:22:28] Speaker D: Ah, but the prevention didn't succeed, did it? Well, it's sort of part, maybe partially, and then. Yeah, so it's going to go forward. [01:22:40] Speaker B: Could be slower rather than held, maybe. [01:22:43] Speaker A: So you hear, like, there's a big poof and you wonder what it was that just happened. [01:22:51] Speaker D: And then I know exactly what's happened. [01:22:56] Speaker A: And then you, like, you, like you feel your cheeks bulge and you. And this bat starts falling out of your mouth and this, like. As this bat, like, pulls itself free and sort of. Sort of flapping in front of you, it, like, looks at you for a moment and what have you done to me? You didn't prevent its moving, but you've prevented it moving. Like it used to as this bat. [01:23:36] Speaker B: Just starts flapping around. Quick. It's a monster. Kill it, landauf. Quick. Do your special killing spell. Oh, my gosh. [01:23:48] Speaker C: A killing spell. Oh, yes, I remember the time I. [01:23:51] Speaker B: Came up with us. Arguably, we've got rid of the evil bat. [01:23:58] Speaker A: There is nothing stopping you from being like. Potentia. Potentia. Potentia. Lightning bolt, lightning bolt. [01:24:05] Speaker B: Lightning bolt, lightning bolt. [01:24:09] Speaker D: Or thermia. Thermia. [01:24:11] Speaker B: Thermia. Burn it. [01:24:14] Speaker C: I'm gonna convert the life force of this bat into thermal energy. [01:24:24] Speaker B: Burn his soul. [01:24:26] Speaker C: I'm gonna burn my soul. [01:24:28] Speaker B: You're casting heat. Death of the universe. Amazing. Okay, so wait, so what was that? First, you see sponge the children from experience, they're fine. [01:24:43] Speaker C: They're just infinitely small. Okay, so that'll be transmutia. [01:24:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:24:59] Speaker C: So convert Vitalia, somataria, tamia. [01:25:06] Speaker A: Convert life. Presumably bat heat. Okay, I suspect this will be the last one of the game. Make it a good one. Convert the life. Yeah, sort of. [01:25:23] Speaker B: The bat sort of very badly wrong. It went right. Spoil sport. It doesn't say reroll until you get something else says reroll it. And we still though it's injective. So let's see what happens. [01:25:45] Speaker C: What does that mean? [01:25:47] Speaker A: You zap. Like, you zap this bat that's flopping in front of your vortefutan. And like the bat, it freezes for a moment and just kind of disappears. Oh, and a puff of smoke. [01:26:04] Speaker B: Very good. [01:26:05] Speaker A: And that happens like, unbeknownst to you, the dark clouds overhead begin to part. And for the first time in a while on this one star hotel, a ray of sunlight begins to shine down. [01:26:23] Speaker B: That's nice. [01:26:25] Speaker A: You're not able to. You never found, like you weren't able to find Count von Notta van Pirovitch, which is odd. I mean, it's very unhostly like of him. But there was a fine buffet laid on in the dining room at 07:00 which you heartily tucked. It was all you can eat, and the beds were difficult to get to because there were no doors to the room. But the night was sound. You looked around, you couldn't see. You couldn't see the count in the morning. So you just kind of said your goodbyes to no one in particular in the morning. And you leave, you left, down the winding path, away from this house, down the hill, through the slightly wonky iron gate. And as you reach the bottom of the hill again, unbeknownst to you, two windows on the front facing of the hotel start to move. Ash twists up in what appears to be a grid and converted into the hotel itself. Count von. Count von Notta van Pirovich. [01:27:42] Speaker C: You're welcome. [01:27:43] Speaker A: Please come again, he says as he lives out the rest of the next few centuries as a living hotel. [01:27:52] Speaker B: Oh, wonderful. Fantastic. Thanks, everyone. [01:27:55] Speaker A: Never. You never found the monster, but you did find the importance of friendship and. [01:28:03] Speaker B: Interior decorating and left a bunch of. Left a bunch of guests entombed, apparently. [01:28:12] Speaker C: Oh, could be worse. Could be the goblin. [01:28:15] Speaker B: They can climb out their windows. [01:28:17] Speaker A: Fundamentally being digested by the living hotel. So thank you, you four, for playing sorcerer supreme. That was about as sensible as it could be. I mean, yeah, I'm here for every moment of it. If you like that, make sure to hit the like button. We have lots of tabletop rpg content on the Explorers elsewhere channel, so it would behoove you to subscribe, if you haven't already. Yeah, we release content very regularly. We won't want you to miss out. You can catch three of these beautiful faces on the current campaign that we're running, and you can catch Tim's beautiful face on the campaign we finished running last year, if you want to give that a go. So thank you all for playing, thank you all for watching, thank you all for your donations to help spice things up. We will see you at 03:00 for Jason Statham's big damnation. Take care. [01:29:20] Speaker B: Bye. Thank you, Dan. Bye.

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